Inspiration comes from the strangest of places sometimes. Today’s happens to be a meme of a hamster rocking some retro pink heart-shaped shades. 

Who am I to argue with what my mind associates with the constant birrage of info whirling around in there?

I have learned to just go wth it. The tune for ‘Yesterday’ was originally an ode to protein that Paul McCartney later put different words to-so don’t judge my furry, well-accessorized muse.

There are so many different things on my mind…I am not even sure where to begin. Let’s start with Tuesday. I was awoken by the sounds of  bleating goats at 3am…remember the roosters I previously wrote about that crowed in the middle of the night?? Yeah, so they are gone (I hope to a good home and not the Colonial’s bucket) and my neighbors now have goats. Two of them. I have considered a bout of goat larceny just to free them from their love-less existence in a tiny little pin. Alas, a life of crime is not on my 2017 bucket-list so I have refrained from any goat smuggling for the present moment.

Anyway-added to my goat wakeup call, Tuesday was a bad news bears kind of day for all of us at Lowesland. Due to restructuring, we lost a lot of fellow colleagues. This was hard to watch go down and the level of “stomachs in knots” that day had to be astronomical. I have a feeling we helped out the local economy with adult beverage purchases that evening. I am thankful I retained my job but definitely poured one out (into my mouth) for my peeps that weren’t so lucky.

I decided to soothe my bruised heart/worries with a milkshake after work. I believe peanut butter and banana milkshakes to have magical restorative properties that can’t be explained by science-much like the fountain of youth but likely more flavorful.

This, folks, was the beginning of a downward spiral of poor nutritional choices I have made this week due to stress and shit weather. Given my dedication to working out and eating healthier lately, I should (and slightly DO) feel ashamed but sometimes you just have to accept your failures and move on.

After I ordered my soul-healing malted yumminess, I attempted to pull up to the window to pay but found two cars in front of me. At the first window (why the hell do restaurants have two when they only use one 99.9999% of the time??) a little old man in a grey golf hat was sitting idly staring at the glass. He seemed slightly disoriented as I watched him in his side mirror. He continued to sit-unmoving-at the wrong window.

I was beginning to worry for his health when suddenly the car between us jolted forward as if to hit the little old man’s back bumper. The driver, a boy (man isn’t a word you could accurately use) in his mid-twenties or early thirties, began screaming obscenities out the window. He called the older man names, and at one point even said “I will f*ck you up if you dont move, old bastard!” After a second more of this, the car jerked out of the drive-thru line and squealed tires all the way out of the parking lot.

Im sorry, whattttt?  Why do acts of red-neckery like this still shock me?

Clearly the older gentleman was having some kind of problem but this guy didn’t give a damn-his only concern was getting the burger he ordered. I was about to get out of the car and walk up to see what was wrong when the man seemed to realize his error and putter up to the correct window.

I waited at least five minutes while he had a convo about something with the man at the drive-thru window. I am not sure he should have been driving and worried about him getting home safely. Maybe I should have called and reported his license tag to have someone check on him but I didn’t. In hindsight I regret not doing more.

I sat there and thought about what had just transpired with the douchebag between us. Initially I was “go kick the shit out of this turd’s car” pissed off. What kind of asshole does things like that??? Especially to an elderly person who was obviously struggling? I have an idea-the same kind of person who kicks cute puppies when no one is looking. The kind of person who has no respect or regard for anyone or anything. It infuriated me…then it turned into something else.

Suddenly the little old man was my daddy. I thought about him getting older. I thought about how one day he might have a “blank moment” and freeze up in the middle of a mundane daily task. I thought about someone being mean like that to him and it broke my heart into a billion pieces. 

When I finally pulled up to the window I was a teary-eyed, snotty mess. To my surprise, the man at the window seemed to be on the verge of tears himself. He witnessed the entire event and said his mother has early onset dementia and the behavior of the jerk-face guy really bothered him too. He said he gave the elderly man his food on the house. His patience and empathy gave me the warm fuzzies and was a reminder that good people will always trump the piles of garbage that inhabit this earth.

I have often thought of my sensitivity to the world to be a curse.

I am a paradox-an extroverted empath. An open book but hard to read if you don’t know my language.  I am fiercly passionate. I feel things more deeply than many others around me. Real connections to others are earth-moving. Music is godlike. Natural beauty is breath-taking. I feel emotions down to the cells of my body.

I used to view this as a weakness-a flaw.

As I have grown older, I realize that while the dichotomy of my personality often makes things more complicated for me I wouldn’t trade it for the world. If you take it away, you erase the essence of who I am-my empathy, my creativity, my ability to love fiercely, my connection to the world around me.

Tomorrow is Friday-thank you sweet infant baby Jesus! This has been a “drink wine straight from the bottle” kinda week but I have almost conqured this b. The weather is better-hello barefoot and outdoors in February-and the weekend is close enough to touch with a fingertip. My excessive calf and leg soreness from my hike from hell last Sunday (my friend Wayne got his hike choosing card revoked indefinitely-and not in a Grayson Allen one game suspension kind of way) is FINALLY almost gone and Aidan just got his invite for the Beta Club again this year. Life is good, yous guys!

At the end of the day, I rock the shit out of my love glasses and I like it that way. ❤

Try on a pair sometime-it’s a look that never goes out of style.